Thursday, November 15, 2012

Negative thoughts are a Home Wrecker

Now that the summer Olympics have come and gone I can’t help but be in awe of all these fresh faced competitors. 

I looked at those athletes from all over the world and wondered how they were able to keep going? Even though they were under so much pressure in some ways it was nothing compared to what they have had to endure most of their lives. They have had to make compromises on a daily basis. They work so hard, all for that one moment in time. These men and women are extraordinary and in my opinion, they are all winners. I can’t imagine dealing with that kind of pressure. Everyday they have had to perform and try to do better than they did the day before.
It makes me wonder why we can’t all try to be extraordinary at something. Why do some people have that kind of killer passion while others just seem to go through the motions?
I think besides this passion above all we need to believe that we can succeed. Lack of passion is a Home Wrecker. We have to really trust that we can achieve our dreams. So many of us second guess ourselves. We are not convinced that the goal is possible. I can’t help wondering if it has to do with how we scrutinize ourselves. Are we praising ourselves or are we being overly critical? These inner voices can really wear you down if they are negative all of the time.
I remember talking to a friend about this very subject. At the time she was deep in therapy and a question that came up in one of her weekly sessions was "how do you talk to yourself?" That was something I had never even thought about. I just never paid attention to how I treated my internal voice. It was then that I realized I was guilty of putting myself down every chance I got. Personally, these voices are not all that forgiving. As much as I try to correct this behavior I find I am often quietly attacking myself. After a while I start to believe those damaging thoughts.
On the outside I may look self assured but secretly I often tear myself to shreds. It is not intentional but it is an everyday occurrence. It is like an automatic response. I can make a mistake and without hesitation those inner voices tear me apart inch by inch. I don’t usually like to admit to this flaw but there it is. It is not something I am proud to confess but on that day it became crystal clear. Once I admitted it to myself I knew I wanted to make a point to change that behavior. It is self destructive and does nothing for me.
So today while I am tackling my daily chores I am going to begin by being a little more complimentary to myself. No more put downs or insults. I am going to exchange the cynical words with new positive ones. I believe if I pay attention I can make this change.

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